cuttlemefishwrites:

“First of all,” Viktor blows his nose into a tissue, not even trying to pretend he’s not crying in front of the camera. “I hope you’re proud of yourself for making a music legend cry. I am a gift from the music gods and you hurt me. I will find you. Now, onto my second point: I give it zero stars. Zero! How could you kill me off? Do you even know who I am? And you made me die bald?”

Yuuri pats his husband’s shoulder, “there, there, Vitya. It wasn’t that graphic. For those that haven’t read it, the story is a lovely get-together post-tragedy fic in which Viktor finds out he has terminal cancer and asks Seunggil to take care of his family, as in me and the kids.”

“Which I would never do! And you! The betrayal! How could you remarry only two months after my death?”

“We’ve talked about this: It’s not real! You know what, go take a walk with the poodles. I’ve got this.”

Fire in Your Eyes. Rated M. If you’re here for the Yuuggie, then skip the first ten chapters of Viktuuri. You won’t be missing much, other than Yuuri crying a million tears (enough to fill Makkachin and Vicchan’s lake over in Villa Vedici,) and Viktor pretending he’s invincible, even as he loses clumps of hair. Tragic. I cried. Also, how dare you?! The following 15 chapters are maybe five too many, with way too many lyric breaks. Look, I get it, we’re Pop Stars, but settle down with the power ballads. Still, A+ for the VikNik playlist on Spotify (and whoever made that remix needs to call me). The actual romance between Yuuri and Seunggil is realistic, even if a little cliche — and it’s obvious whoever wrote this has traveled to Japan and Korea. And, for the record, I would not remarry after two months. That’s crazy! Extra points for remembering that Eureka currently only wants to wear tutus. It was a cute little bonus for the wedding. Nothing too graphic in this one, except for chapter 26, which, personally, I think should’ve raised the rating to E. Reader beware: This is a soap opera packaged into a fanfic.

I’m laughing so hard, omg

crossroadswrite:

i love two whole dumbasses, hope this is close to what you wanted!!

[AO3]

“Sold!”
Phichit shouts, banging the gavel they had scoured five different thrift shops
for on the table. “To the gentleman with the big forehead!”

The
gentleman in question slaps his hand to his forehead and looks offended. Yuuri
really wishes Phichit wouldn’t provoke him, since Yuuri will have to spend the
rest of the night with him.

“Please pay
for your one spectacular night with our precious boy Yuuri, and remember! Your
dates aren’t obligated to do anything besides being pleasant to you, and if
they feel threatened or unsafe at any time they can leave,” Phichit says, still
cheerfully, but there’s a certain edge to his voice that twists it into a
threat, which is backed up by the two bouncers Phichit hired to attend the
event.

Hired, is perhaps a strong word. Phichit is friends
with half of the bouncers in the city, most of them have sort of adopted him,
so it wasn’t that hard to get a couple of them to stand around and look scary
for three hours in exchange for unlimited access to food and drink.

“You have
my phone number, yeah?” Kat – one of the bouncers – asks, when Yuuri climbs off
the makeshift stage to go meet his… date.

“Yeah.”

“If
anything happens, call or text me right away.
Did you turn the GPS on your phone on?”

“I did,
don’t worry.”

“Good. I’ll
walk you to him,” she says, and crosses her arms so her biceps are immediately
visible.

In normal
circumstances, Yuuri wouldn’t be this paranoid about going out with some guy,
especially one as beautiful and charming as Victor Nikiforov. He’d be nervous
and awkward because that’s just his normal state of being, but he would gladly
loop his arm through Victor’s and let himself be guided anywhere Victor wanted
to go.

The thing
is: Victor is a serial killer. Maybe. Probably.

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